Bishop-elect Gray-Reeves' Message September 10, 2007

Dear Friends,

Greetings of Peace and Grace to all! Mike, Katie, Dorian and I are in El Camino Real, and are daily settling into life here. The kids love their schools, we love our temporary home, Mike’s home office is set up, our Florida home is in escrow (a miracle in itself in this market!) and we are finding our way around the Peninsula. As you know, our transition, already full of details and intricacies, was made even more bountiful by my mother’s death. I want to thank you for your concern, love, prayers, cards, flowers, gifts and presence during this amazing time. We have literally been surrounded, coast-to-coast by our Christian family, and the love of Christ that flows through the Body of the Church. This support has empowered us and strengthened us to walk step-by-step on the path God has set before us. Please know that we are well; a little tired, but really okay. I have attached my mother’s obituary and a photo of her with my sister Joanne, taken as my mother was receiving a “Woman of the Year” award in 2006. This may be more information than you wanted, but as I have begun to have conversations with many in the diocese, people want to know something of Florence Gray’s life – and death - since her passing has come at this unique moment of our history.
 

Indeed, it was time for Florence Gray to take her place with the angels and archangels. For the last year and a half she wore a diaper and her food was pureed for easier swallowing. She had a barely audible voice, although aware of much of what was going on around her. She lived through an end that we all fear. Despite the slow and debilitating effects of Parkinson’s disease, her five kids took her lots of places and she was part of the fullness of life. In fact, my ordination to the episcopate would have been the first major family event she would not have been able to attend. I imagine that given her faith and our relationship, this simply would not do! Katie noted at her passing, “Now Grandma can come to the ordination!” Leave it to the 14 year old to perhaps know something of her grandmother’s agenda, and to speak faithfully of the reality of the communion of saints.

My mom’s life was well-lived. She had a heart for the poor and marginalized, and was part of both major movements in history, as well as seemingly insignificant moments in all sorts of places that made a difference in the lives of many. If I were choosing a Biblical character that represented her spiritual life and work, it would be the woman of chapter 15 of Matthew’s gospel that petitions Jesus to help her tormented daughter, and gets the response: “I was sent only for the lost sheep of Israel”. Politely and humbly, the woman kneels and begs. Jesus continues, “It is not fair to take the children’s food and toss it to the dogs”. The courageous and perhaps mouthy woman says clearly, “Even the dogs get the crumbs from under the table….” If this woman had lived today, I imagine arms folded across the chest, a head bobble, and a wagging finger! My mom was also a persistent nag for the sake of justice. She would take on Jesus Christ himself if she thought it would grant access to resources and God’s Kingdom to persons that society may cast aside. From both my parents (my father James died in May of 2002) I receive an abundant inheritance of a clear witness of Jesus Christ, faithful Christian living, community caring and involvement, and I pray, a bit of my mother’s tenacious and mouthy spirit! While in the ‘Peace of God that passes all understanding’, I grieve the loss now of both my parents, the sadness is so much smaller than the blessing I feel to be their daughter.

As I conclude, I think it is important to remember it is often a major life-event, like the loss of a loved one, that brings people to church. My prayer and reflection during these past weeks has engendered gratitude for my faith life and community, and compassion for those who do not have a context in which to make sense of, and be supported through, such pain. As a member of the Body of Christ, I have real physical and spiritual space in which to grieve and celebrate my mother’s passing. As Christians, we daily walk with Jesus and intentionally practice His presence. Such day to day living adds up, and creates in us the knowledge of eternal life and a real experience of inner peace. Many in this world go through such times lost and alone. My heart goes out to them; it should not be this way. May we tenaciously welcome with love and compassion all those who seek a place to make sense of the fullness of life. Thank you for just such a welcome to me and my family.

Obituary of Florence Gray

Florence Louise Delano Gray died peacefully at home, August 26, 2007. Florence was born in Kalamazoo, Michigan on February 27, 1926. She was 81 years old. She leaves five children and their families, including 14 grandchildren and four great-grandchildren, two sisters, a large extended family, and many friends. She follows in eternal life, her husband James. Florence was a long-time, active member of St. Stephen’s Episcopal Church in Coconut Grove, as well as the Coconut Grove Women’s Club, the Equal Rights Movement, The Nature Conservancy, and The Audubon Society. She was active in various community and religious organizations such as Coconut Grove Cares, El Hogar Home for Boys in Honduras, The Cursillo Community as well as numerous outreach ministries through St. Stephen’s. Florence participated in historic events such as the Pedro Pan flights and the Civil Rights movement, and in 2006 received a commendation from the Miami Dade County Commissioners for her community involvement. Throughout her life